Suzanne
The significance of nine can mean many things. Some cats are said to have nine lives. Nine years is more than many marriages last. There are nine innings in baseball. Nine months can bring forth new life. Nine years can mark the change from a toddler to a teenager or can be the defining times that bring a teenager to adulthood. Cloud 9 denotes great happiness. The number nine holds a special meaning for me this year as it marks nine anniversaries since I heard the words “you have incurable colon cancer.” Nine years of new seasons, birthdays, anniversaries, memories, miracles and hope.
In years past, I’ve described this diagnosis as a battle, a fight, a war, a roller-coaster ride, a merry-go-round, a voyage, a journey, a seven-year itch, and even a dance. All fit, but the greatest gift this year has given me is the realization that I’m not dying from colon cancer. I am living fully in spite of it. I have reaped the benefits of research, a dedicated team of doctors, and increasing options….It is important that the momentum continue and that research is not thwarted, not only for me and my family but for the families of 1500 others that will lose loved ones today and each day after today.
Treatment keeps life exciting. I respond well and it has become an opportunity to bridge time. I honestly can’t imagine my life without it anymore….perhaps that dependency has helped foster my survival. In between treatment, not a moment is wasted! I’ve done things that I would have never attempted without cancer (including sky diving and scuba diving)- lobbying with C3: Colorectal Cancer Coalition, NCCS, LAF, and ACS as well as bringing to fruition YES (www.y90support.org) - which is a support group for those who have undergone Y90 treatments(Sir-Spheres or Therasphere), speaking, meeting new people and telling a very private story in extremely public places. My life has touched others as they have touched mine and increased my understanding of hope. Hope is a guiding force in life and is the closest thing to a magic wand. It is the golden gossamer thread that harvests happiness, opens possibilities, promises a future, and encourages getting lost in the moment. With hope, I glimpse the “all of life” and the “muchness” within every waking minute. For nine years I have lived with a gift that many never have the opportunity to open. It is the gift of NOW. My children have nine years of journals and thoughts for every step of their youth, pictures and love, memories and moments, and an awareness that not many their age experience. My husband and I have learned to embrace every day and we have a strong appreciation for the present day.
Nine signifies the number of borrowed years that I have enjoyed. Nine years ago I was handed a death sentence….one that we are each handed the minute we are born…but never fully understand. Cancer provides that clarity. It was never expected that I would see the dawn of the new year, my children grow up, another anniversary with my husband, and definitely not my 40th birthday. Much has happened in these past nine years. Every day is a blessing. Nine is incredibly fine!
11 Responses to “ Suzanne ”
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June 25th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
I love your story..and you are so right cancer does give us clarity and I certainly can relate to the gift of NOW!! I hope your story touches many more lives and inspires all the more..
July 2nd, 2008 at 8:11 am
Dear Suzanne,
You are LIGHT in my life! An incredible force of nature! I am so fortunate to have you in my life!
You are the blessing,
Love,
Jean
July 2nd, 2008 at 9:22 am
I do not have the words in my vocabulary to describe what you mean to me. Many, many blessings have come my way and among the top ones is a lady named, Suzanne.
July 2nd, 2008 at 9:27 am
You are AMAZING and my hero! I can’t wait to share a decade of survivorhsip with you.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Praise God!
My good friend and yours, Loretta, has kept me posted over the years on your condition. The Lord is good and has been with you all the way.
God Bless You.
July 2nd, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Suzanne,
You are amazing as you are Blessed. you are a shining star and you give so many “HOPE”. You are that bright shining star for many.I love you my dear, dear friend. I am Blessed to know you and have you in my life. You are such a special person Suzanne.Each day a struggle, Each day a victory, Each day one day ata time.
Ellen
July 2nd, 2008 at 7:06 pm
I am so proud of you!! You are an inspiration to me and everyone you come in contact with. I love you. Renee
July 3rd, 2008 at 8:52 am
Suzanne,
Meeting you for the frst time made me believe that I too could watch my babies grow up. And that hope alone has given me renewed faith — I am going to make it afterall! (that old Mary Tyler Moore show song just poopped into my head and is now my mantra). Despite cancer, I am the happiest and most well adjusted I have ever been in my life! Suzanne, you are a huge part of this. All my love and admiration.
Lisa Frey
July 4th, 2008 at 12:58 pm
Suzann you are a true blessing to the people that know you. keep up the great work. with all my heart Bud
July 12th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
Suz…you are a blessing from HEAVEN and I remember so much the time we had spent on the phone as Dan was passing trying to figure out ways to save him …..I miss you and want to say I love you !! and KEEP THE FAITH because of you and only you so many people are here and will continue to do as you do each and every day….Try to find a CURE!!!!!!!!!!! Here in Toledo…
Tammy
July 16th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Suzanne - You are unique! Your faith and steadfastness in the face of nine years of really hard work is an inspiration to me! I look at each day differently since I met you only six months ago. You DO live life to the fullest and your honesty with your family and gazillion friends is now ideal with communicating about my CRC. As my kids say: “You ROCK!”
love, Pam Nine IS Fine!